So I went back to Hobby Lobby today for the first time since the strange incident last week. (Recap, I was essentially stalked and followed through the store and then in my car by a man who finally turned off and stopped following me.) And I was scared. I hate to admit it. I feel a bit like a baby. But I was truly afraid. I kept looking around, over my shoulder, at all the cars around me, all the people were suspect to me. I quickly went in and got what I needed and got the hell out of dodge.
Every black car of any kind but especially SUV had me looking in my rear view mirror to see how long they were going to be behind my car. I really feel traumatized by the experience from last week. Who knows what would have happened to me had I not been on my toes, fully aware of that gut feeling thing that I call God, telling me to be weary of this man, watch him closely. Bad things happen every day. It’s a scary world.
I think about all the victims of sexual assaults, or kidnappings, any kind of violent crime, who survived, and think – wow – what they must live with. If my experience with a possible “bad guy” has affected me this strongly, I can’t imagine what someone who has gone through a violent crime and survived goes through daily. If you have been affected by crime, my heart goes out to you. I say a prayer for your heart and the memories that probably haunt you. May you find the healing I’m sure you’re desperately seeking.
As for me, I hope this paranoia and trauma goes away soon. I don’t want to be constantly looking behind my back, or watching every car. There’s a line between being careful and being paranoid.
Crazy how big North Texas is and yet how small it feels now – thinking that I’ll run across him again.